I've spent a lot of my life worrying about being too big or "too much." From growing up in the ballet world and constantly receiving messaging about not letting my body get too bulky, to being told I'm "loud and intense" when I'd speak up about uncomfortable truths in conversations, or just simply seeing images of successful women in magazines who always seem to look petite and put together and "perfect" -- we've all had our own experience with it.
It's taken me a lot of years to begin to notice the ways I keep myself small for the sake of meeting some standard of perceived success or "enoughness" -- more on that soon -- and one of the most powerful practices on my journey of reclaiming my space and showing up fully is through mindful movement and breath. I actually created my signature Come Alive practice for this exact reason.
What does taking up space look and feel like for you? What practices have supported you in remembering?
Taking up space looks like asking/receiving help from others. I was taught that getting help was being an inconvenience to others (aka taking up too much time, energy and space). These are thoughts I have to overcome daily. Now I try to ask for help from others more often and when someone offers me something, I try not to say "no thank you" as much!
I love this question, Dani. Every weekend I am constantly trying to take advantage of the time between spending time with loved ones, running errands, cooking, working out, prepping for the week ahead, the list goes on and on... But this Sunday, I took time for myself and just laid on my couch for an hour reading. I'm happy I took a step back and put myself first.
I love this @danielle -- it's so easy to get caught up in the cycle of giving and sharing our energy and forget to replenish and turn that back towards ourselves. I love the idea of just spending time with ourselves and resting being a form of taking up and reclaiming our space. Thank you for this reminder 🙂
Oh wow, love this Dani!
I've been thinking a lot lately what being enough truly is and how I define success.
For a long time I sought approval from the others and was constantly pushing myself towards more professional accomplishments whether it be leadership roles, awards or titles.
Now I keep it super basic:
Drinking all the water in my 1L bottle is a win.
Taking a 5 min break to enjoy the sunshine outside my office is a win.
Picking up the kids socks by the front door and putting it in the hamper 3 flights up is a win.
Sending a funny gif to gal pal's group chat to brighten their day (and mine) is a win.
How do I take up space now?
TBH, simply and with the least amount of stress and negative self talk as possible. It's all the little moments that add up that bring richness and meaning to life.