Parenting Adult Kids

kj36928
Member

My girls are in their 20s, with the oldest turning 25 next year. They're working adult jobs, dating, traveling etc. I'm trying to build an adult connection with them rather than looking at them as kids so they feel empowered and independent. Any advice on how to transform the the relationship and make it stronger?

5 REPLIES 5

EchoJ
Member
I am a twenty something and I can tell you, the relationship with my dad and I has grown stronger with the recent years. He always continues to support and teach me even though I am an independent individual. Never fail to tell your sweet kids that they mean the world to you. A hurried life can cause distance, however remaining a constant variable in their life will reassure them to always lean back whenever times are tough. Don’t be afraid of the quiet when life gets busy. Your kids will never forget who/what they came from. Best of luck and take care!💕

So glad to hear your relationship with your dad is strengthening @EchoJ. I agree, sometimes its good to embrace the quiet. I know they're great and they make me proud every day. Thank you!

sotoalyssalol
Member
I hold I close relationship with my mother who’s 25 years older than me. I’ve come to appreciate her insight into not only her experiences in life but what influence she still has on me as an adult . It’s extremely important in me and my moms relationship that we have constant communication. She makes herself available with verbal reminders that she is there to hear me out on any topics and that questions I have she can only answer though her experience on the topic. As children we expect our parents to have the answers to everything, but as adults understanding that my mother can just be available to me is better than seeking out an answer to my issues . I’d suggest just openly reminding your children that you are there for them, reminding them that they are adults and that you are, yes their mom, but an adult with them trying to grow with them.

I've been trying to be more patient with them and give them the space to "try life out". I'm glad to hear that you're giving your mom grace as well. Great advice, thank you @sotoalyssalol 

Even when I wanted to “try life out” I always seeked my mothers approval in what I am meant to do and what standards I’m supposed to have in the “adult world” for myself . Offering what you did for yourself or what you wished was something you would have asked your own guardian/mother may help as well for your daughters to seek your guidance still as adults . Wishing you and your family the best !